On Balance

I'm feeling completely out of balance.  There, I said it.  With my little guy just having turned 3 months old (actually 14 weeks already - how did that happen?!), I feel like I should have it all together by now.  Shouldn't I be able to spread my time out equally to cover maintaining a beautiful and clean home, prepare beautiful and delicious (not to mention perfectly nutritionally balanced) meals, and an successful career, all the while regaining my pre-pregnancy (or better) body and looking beautifully rested?  Come on!  When I'm thinking like this, I have to ask myself, is it about me or everyone else?  Am I worried about the image or the reality of my life?  Who cares anyway?
 

Source: I have no idea. Found on FB and saved weeks and weeks ago. I'll do better, I promise. 
If it's yours, please let me know and I'll credit you or remove it - your choice.

Last Friday, I missed a meeting. Granted, I didn't get a meeting reminder on my not-so-smart phone (which is my brain some days), but I knew I had a meeting.  I returned home from some time at the office and planned to join the meeting by phone, but the wheels fell off and my son needed all of my attention.  He got it.  The meeting went on without me.

Tuesday, I missed another meeting.  My childcare (which is totally reliable and seriously wonderful) fell through - I didn't want a vomiting nanny anyway.  I see you shaking your head in agreement.

I'm at least a month behind on reading for some volunteer work that I do.  I may never catch up.

I double booked myself this week on at least two occasions. 

The laundry is about to swallow me.  I don't think I have another clean bib in the house and my little guy's cloth diapers are almost all dirty.  We're about to be down to the ragged ones - you know, momma, the ones that you never use and often think about cutting into cleaning cloths?  Yeah, those.

And yet...the days go on with a familiar and comfortable rhythm. I wake up to find my sweet little guy smiling in his crib, ready to start the day.  Nurse, change diaper, change clothes (sometimes multiple times for both of us), play, nap - repeat.  In between, write, email, call, let the dog out - let the dog in 42 times.

Source: As above.

Balance is an illusion - much like control.  We can't control everything, but we can control some things.  I can't control anything beyond what's sitting in this seat.  Sometimes I don't feel like I can control that.  What I can control is my attitude, my self-talk.  My reactions.  My choices.  I choose to breathe.  I choose to relax.  I choose to receive love and joy and peace from my Heavenly Father through His Word and the gifts of my sweetheart, my precious little boy, and my loyal pup.  For me, that's what real balance is - everything else is...everything else. Have a healthy day!